time..

by Alanna

I can feel it slipping through my fingers these days. A little boy back from the hospital, edges into the corner of my heart, and of course, God makes room. I wonder how another piece of my heart can possibly stay here in Africa when I leave. I feel King’s scratchy hair under my chin as he pulls my arms around his tummy. He wants me always to hold his hand now, as he falls asleep. So my thoughts fly back to another time, in the same room, sitting between two other beds with my arms stretched, one precious hand in each of mine. Oh how the time slips away. Before you can see the days passing, they are gone. Just a string of beautiful moments, small hands, whispers of “I love you”. I remember thinking when I came, how long six months would be. I would have so much time with them. And here is the end. Now I am counting down days instead of months, and a panic rises up in me and cries “slow down!” But really it is just a reminder to take nothing for granted. To cherish them, to love them and delight in them with every fleeting moment I have left. Really I believe this is the end of my time at TLC. I am ready to go home. But who is ever ready to say goodbye? To leave behind five months of singing them to sleep? To leave behind their hugs and their laughter and the beautiful way they smile? Their little footprints are imbedded all over my heart, never to be erased. And tonight it is ok to ache, to let myself cry for them. But God’s plans are so beyond goodbyes. A friend once told me that in heaven, all time will be redeemed. So tonight I am not only learning to cherish every moment, but I am also reminded of our redemption. Of a future that God in His great mercy has bestowed on us- a future with no heartache, no broken pieces, no tears. An eternity of worshipping and loving the Savior, and never again feeling time slip away.