rocking a baby

by Alanna

    This past weekend I got to hold a recently born little boy, and he was restless. He would drift off to sleep for a few minutes, and look so peaceful, but then wake up again. I wonder if he would have slept better if I had just set him down somewhere. Or maybe he was just not sleepy.
   I have vivid memories of South Africa, sitting in that little green rocking chair. I wanted to rock him to sleep, because I didn't want to part with him. And it was such a peaceful feeling to hold him near until his tiny body was at rest. But he was restless, and he always slept better after I laid him down in his crib. He needed sleep to grow strong, and so often I put him down sooner than I wanted to. Time is precious. And I never want to take moments for granted. Now, memories is all I really have.
  But it reminds me, that sometimes we have to lay down our dearest loves, so that God can grow them strong. He is capable and trustworthy.  I still think of him everyday, and my heart still aches. But I know, even in my ignorance, that God is doing something so beautiful and so right and so good in his life. A little over one year ago, I surrendered him to God for the first time. So I know, I've learned this lesson right? I'm so thankful that God taught me to lay little one down. Sometimes sacrifice is the very thing that God uses to build something beautiful. And I'm fully confident that whatever plans God has for that little boy, they are incredible.